Shared Service Creates Family and Community Connections

Jen Buckner and her children volunteering at EIS. Photo by Makenzie Howard Photography

When Jen Buckner began volunteering at Emergency Infant Services (EIS), it was to fulfill a requirement for a college class. But what started as an obligation quickly turned into a mission—first for Jen and then for her three children.

Buckner’s youngest child, Luka, was just 3 years old when he started tagging along with his mom. Luka is now 7 and a regular fixture, along with his 13-year-old brother, Declan, and 15-year-old sister Bella.

“Volunteering at EIS has inspired confidence in all my kids,” Jen says.

It’s also shown them the impact they can make by giving their time.

“Teaching kids to care for other people around them is so valuable, and I love the hands-on opportunity to teach them about this when we volunteer together at EIS.”

The reasons kids choose to volunteer vary, but the effect is almost always positive: encouraging responsibility, building empathy and giving kids a new perspective. Many start through required service hours for school or church youth groups, while others begin at a young age by watching and modeling their parents’ example.

For the Buckner family, EIS has become an extension of their own family. The kids know the staff and have formed friendships with other longtime volunteers. When they first started, the Buckners spent much of their time cleaning toys to put into the boutique. It’s a simple but meaningful job that gives even the youngest volunteers a chance to contribute. Declan especially enjoys finding special toys for other kids to take home, Jen said.

Harmony Blackburn also brought her kids to volunteer at EIS when they were just 3 and 4 years old. Now 9 and 11, they’ve grown up helping at the organization.

“Whether sorting donated clothes, bagging diapers or helping me interview and gather necessities for clients, they interact with families and volunteers from all walks of life and gain valuable life skills,” she said.

Harmony Blackburn and her family volunteering at EIS

Why Volunteering Matters

Volunteering isn’t just helpful for the organizations being served—it also benefits the volunteers themselves. Kids who volunteer often gain confidence, empathy and a sense of purpose. For parents, it’s a chance to model values, connect with their kids and become more involved in their community.

Research shows that volunteering can even improve mental well-being and strengthen social bonds, especially when done regularly. That consistency creates momentum, making families want to serve more and often encouraging kindness, resilience and a deeper understanding of how we’re all connected.

Choosing to Volunteer

The process of finding the right volunteer opportunity—especially one that fits your family’s interests and schedule—can feel overwhelming.

Some parents worry their child may be too young or not mature enough to handle certain tasks, especially when volunteering with organizations that serve people experiencing homelessness or crisis. But many nonprofits, including City Lights Foundation of Oklahoma, welcome young volunteers. At City Lights’ Night Light Tulsa program, children work alongside their parents serving food, handing out toiletries and meeting other needs of Tulsa’s homeless population.

Of course, volunteering with kids isn’t always straightforward. And some families simply don’t have extra time.

Blackburn acknowledges the time crunch many parents feel but encourages them to start small.

“Whether we have 30 minutes or an entire afternoon, there is never a shortage of meaningful tasks to be done,” she said.

What matters most is showing kids what it looks like to show up for someone else.

Some families opt for more structured opportunities, like National Charity League or the Young Men’s Service League. NCL, which has chapters in Tulsa and Jenks, is for mothers and daughters in grades 7-12. YMSL is for mothers and sons in grades 9-12. Both organizations require a multiyear commitment and partner with local nonprofits to offer hands-on service.

Wendy Buehrer and her daughter, Sophie, joined NCL when Sophie was entering seventh grade.

“The timing was perfect,” Buehrer said. “It was a time when Sophie was spending more time with friends, and NCL gave us the opportunity to bond and experience new things together.”

The two have volunteered with organizations including EIS, Global Gardens and Pet Adoption League.

“When we walk away from volunteering, we praise God and we pray for everybody we just served,” Buehrer said. “Our hearts are so filled and full. It creates momentum and makes you want to volunteer more.”

Connecting With Your Child

Volunteering isn’t just about giving—it’s also about connecting. When families serve together, they often build relationships not only with each other, but also with fellow volunteers, staff and the people they serve.

Declan Buckner became friends with one of the older volunteers at EIS, and they still enjoy catching up when there together. It’s relationships like those that make this more than just a task—it has become part of the Buckners’ lives.

Shared service also creates space for parents and kids to talk, reflect and strengthen their bond.

Buehrer says the time she spends volunteering with her daughter is meaningful in a way that’s hard to replicate, and that they walk away with a shared purpose.

Whether it’s bagging diapers or planting vegetables, volunteering as a family does more than fill a need in the community—it creates meaningful, shared experiences that last. It shows kids they matter, and that their time, energy and compassion can make a real difference.

Tips: How to Start Volunteering with Your Kids

1. Start small. Look for one-time or short shifts that match your child’s age and interest.
2. Ask about age requirements. Many nonprofits have guidelines but will welcome younger kids with supervision.
3. Make it a routine. Whether once a month or once a season, set a goal that works for your family.
4. Follow your child’s lead. If your child loves animals, art or books, find a cause that connects.
5. Talk about it. After volunteering, ask your child how it felt and what they noticed. Reflection helps reinforce the experience.

Where to Volunteer in Tulsa

There are many volunteer opportunities for families across the Tulsa area. Reach out to the volunteer coordinator at a nonprofit to ask what their needs might be and if kids are welcome. Some organizations allow supervised participation even if there’s a minimum age requirement.

• Food Bank of Eastern Oklahoma: Sort donated food or assist with drive-through distribution events.
• Emergency Infant Services: Sort donations, clean toys and assist clients.
• Iron Gate: Serve community meals or work in the grocery pantry.
• Pet Adoption League: Walk dogs or help at adoption events.
• Tulsa Dream Center: Help with food distribution and events.
• Catholic Charities: Make meals for the Porta Caeli House, serve in the onsite food pantry market or help at the Madonna House.

Natalie Mikles is a mom of three. She writes about food, sharing recipes for busy families and picky eaters. Natalie Mikles has been recognized for her food columns as well as features on families and issues affecting local children. She loves pizza and movie nights with her family.