Friends with Benefits

Oh how things change over the years. Eight o’clock dinner reservations are replaced with eight o’clock bedtimes. Alarm clocks become obsolete and the term “friends with benefits” now refers to a girlfriend who is giving me her old breastpump.

Recently, one of my oldest and best friends had her first baby. I did my best to prepare her for the highs and lows of those first few weeks. I had talked to her about sleep deprivation, but it’s definitely one of those things that you have to experience for yourself.

So, once she had the baby, I knew that what she needed from me was plain ol’ support. A couple of texts a day, a couple of phone calls to see how she’s doing, a “you’re not crazy, you’re exhausted” pep talk. I advised her to set her DVR so she’d have something to watch on television while she’s up in the middle of the night nursing for hours with no one to talk to (a newborn isn’t great with conversation). And of course, a lecture on sleeping when the baby is sleeping.

To me, these were all minor things that I’m more than happy to do. But a couple of days ago, I got a lovely package of thanks in the mail from her and a note saying how much it meant. It felt so good to be able to help out a friend who has helped me so many times.

It’s funny to think how much we’ve been through over the years, but sharing the experience of motherhood has brought us even closer as friends.

Sometimes, not all the time, but most of the time, I am so thankful to be a woman.