Boys Will Be Boys

The video of Donald Trump talking about women in that misogynistic way he has, and then issuing an “apology” that it was just “locker-room banter” made me wonder what exactly goes on in his locker room. Did he really say that as long as his disgusting conversation about women was just an example of guys talking to guys that it’s okay to demean and objectify women? That was his apology? I think it’s time to do away with the “boys will be boys” excuse for inexcusable behavior, not just for Mr. Trump, but for all of us.

Is this the example he set for his sons, or that we should set for our sons? When Mr. Trump talks about women as sexual objects, he sends a signal to boys that this is appropriate behavior. The man is a presidential nominee. He should be someone that parents can point to as an example of good character. Instead, parents are probably rushing to turn off the television or cover their kids’ eyes and ears when Mr. Trump appears on the screen.

Frankly, I’m tired of the “boys will be boys” excuse. I’ve heard it from parents whose sons have trashed a house during a drunken party. I’ve heard it from a mom whose son and his friends egged another boy’s house, just to bully him. I’ve heard it from a dad whose son punched another child. Boys will be boys. I’m sure there are people who will give Mr. Trump a pass because they believe that’s just how the world is – that’s what men do. They’re wrong.

When we objectify anyone – people of color, people with disabilities, people who are different in any way – we make it easy to abuse and discard them. When we make excuses for crude, violent or lascivious behavior, we are just as much at fault as the person behaving badly. When we give our boys the excuse that this kind of talk and behavior is somehow “normal,” is it any wonder that college campuses are having to educate students about sexual assault?

Women will never have equality, equal pay for equal work or even be treated with respect as long as men like Mr. Trump continue to objectify them. Mr. Trump is excusing his treatment of women as just the way guys talk to each other. I can only hope that neither one of my daughters ever gets into a relationship with a guy like that.