The Silver Lining in Single Parenting
Going through a divorce is heart wrenching, especially when there are children involved. Being a single parent is tough, yet I don’t think anyone would deny that to every dark cloud, there is a silver lining. I was saddened by my divorce and especially hated it for my children’s sake, but along the way, I did discover a few perks. Why not look for the good in a tough situation?
Finally, there is enough closet space! No more tripping over size 12 shoes left in the middle of the closet floor, no more cramming your clothes into your half of the closet- the closet is yours to spread out your clothes and if the budget allows, buy a few more things to fill in the spaces his absence has left.
No more fights over the whose turn it is to shower first, no whiskers left in the bathroom sink, and best of all, no more fighting over the position of the toilet seat!
As the great mother you are, of course you still want to provide healthy, nutritious meals for your children but in the absence of another adult, it’s a bit easier to justify an occasional frozen pizza as a well balanced meal. The kids won’t complain!
Some may disagree, but having a big bed all to yourself isn’t necessarily a bad thing! Watch TV in bed, hog all the blankets, eat chocolates and enjoy the peaceful silence of no snoring!
If you’re fortunate enough to have a cooperative, involved ex, you may have the pleasure of having every other weekend sans kids. Not saying you don’t love your kids, but a break now and then can be a good thing! Go a little crazy; sleep late and eat junk food. The weekends are your reward for being the only parent the other days of the week.
You are now the one and only boss of the home. Without another adult in the home, you get to make the rules and determine the direction the family is going. There is no one to undermine you or to change the rules. You are the undisputed ruler of the castle!
Out of necessity, you will discover that you are stronger than you thought, more capable than you ever dreamed, and smarter than you imagined. Without someone else to rely on, you will develop new skills, unearth inner resources and find yourself belting out, “This Girl is on Fire” and meaning it!
This isn’t meant to trivialize the pain of divorce, there’s no minimizing that loss. But don’t give up your power to determine your mindset and your attitude. There is a lot of truth in the quote “You may not be able to control what happens to you, but you can control how you react.”