Celebrating Strong Women During Women’s History Month

“You is Kind. You is smart. You is important.” Those unforgettable words were spoken by Aibileen to her young charge, Mae Mobley, in the book and movie, The Help by Kathryn Stockett. Mae was in desperate need of that positive affirmation. Most of us would benefit from having those words spoken to us. When addressing my daughters or granddaughters, I would add the adjective strong. We want all our children and grandchildren, boys and girls, to be kind, smart, important, and strong, but girls especially need to hear that they are strong. As mothers and grandmothers, it is essential that we show our daughters and granddaughters what a strong female can be.

With March designated as Women’s History Month, my mind has been traveling back through history to all the strong women who have made vital contributions and led the fight for women’s equality. There are so many powerful women in the history books that it would be impossible to name them all, but I am grateful for the suffragettes who fought for women’s right to vote, which was finally granted in 1920. In 1972, Title IX was passed, giving women equal access to educational opportunities, and it wasn’t until 1974, with the passage of the Equal Credit Opportunity Act, that women were assured they could get credit cards in their own names. Also, in the 1970s, it was ruled that women could get birth control without their husbands’ permission. Until the Pregnancy Discrimination Act of 1978, women could get fired for being pregnant.

These changes occurred because women fought for them. Sadly, we must continue to fight so our daughters and granddaughters retain these rights. We show our daughters and granddaughters the way by setting an example of standing up for justice, speaking up for what is right and fair. This starts in small ways and extends to bigger actions. Discuss female role models and talk about what they do and the impact they have on the world, but also point out women in your community making a difference. There are also women we meet in our everyday lives who serve as role models for strong women.

One of my personal regrets is not recognizing how strong my mother was until she was gone. As a mother to a child with disabilities in the ’60s, an era when doctors were reluctant to listen to women, my mother had to continually fight to be heard and get her child’s needs met. She was a strong advocate for my brother. Until I took over guardianship after her death, I didn’t understand how difficult her role was. I wish I could tell her how much I deeply admire and respect her tireless efforts and devotion to caring for my brother.

It’s women like my mother who never get recognition for what they do who are the unsung heroes. The mothers of children with disabilities, single mothers, women caring for their parents while caring for their children, women working two jobs to support their families, and women volunteering to improve their communities are to be admired. These are great examples of strong women who never make the headlines but deserve our recognition and respect.

How can you help your daughter or granddaughter become a strong woman?

1. Believe in her and let her know that you do, encourage her passions, and support her by showing up.
2. Even though it’s painful, allow her to fail, and encourage her to keep trying. Perseverance and strength are often forged through failures.
3. Encourage her to express her opinion, even if it’s not a popular one. This gives her confidence and develops assertiveness.
4. Praise characteristics such as kindness, effort, character, and intelligence.
5. Model confidence. Watching how you treat others, speak up for yourself, set goals, and handle stress will teach her. They are always watching.
6. Give her age-appropriate independence. Let her make decisions and choices when possible. Childhood is the time to learn responsibility and build self-esteem by facing challenges while in a supportive environment.
7. Model body positivity and teach her that she is the owner of her body. Give her the power to say no to unwanted touch, even from family and friends.
8. Read books about inspiring women in history.

My only granddaughter is the oldest daughter and the oldest granddaughter, and at five years old, I see some of the “eldest daughter” traits emerging. That’s mostly a good thing. I tell Sylvia she is kind, she is smart, she is important, and she is strong! I’m trusting that she will believe those words and internalize them as she matures.

“Here’s to strong women: May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them!”